When news broke late yesterday that Sarah Palin had finished writing her memoir, “Going Rogue,” early, the blogosphere wasted no time. A sampling, from the hilarious to the horrifying, follows. We’ll keep adding to this list as the quips keep coming, and so should you: comment, e-mail, or tweet us using the tag #palinbook.
“Many in the mainstream media will also be eager to see how the Republican hockey mom praises them for their objective portrayals of her—and, indeed, her entire family—all last fall.”—L.A. Times Top of the Ticket
“Harper … has moved the release date up from the spring to November 17. That gives Palin followers just less than two months to learn how to read.”—Faded Youth
“I’ve come to learn that if Palin is involved in anything in any way, shape, or form, then the chance of batshit insane things happening increases exponentially. Even if it’s her dictating her “life story” to a ghostwriter. She is like the King Midas of batshit crazy.”—Balloon Juice
“The world will discover the true Sarah Palin and the truth to which we have not heretofore had access. She will give the public her own unfiltered message—untainted by the likes of the agenda-ridden mainstream media. You might want to get in line now.”—Sarah’s Web Brigade
“The book was slated for the spring, but was finished so why not get it out in time for holiday sales?”—Elect-SarahPalin.com
“She needs the money sooner because her handler, Meg Stapleton, screwed up the negotiations for last week’s Hong Kong speaking debut by inadvertently agreeing that Palin would be compensated in Chinese Renminbis rather than U.S. Dollars.”—Lynnrockets
“Sarah Palin finishes memoir, a 400 page pop-up book. Comes with free Crayons, Palin-English dictionary, aspirin.”—Muck Rack
“In lieu of sanctions, copies of former US Vice President hopeful Sarah Palin’s memoir ‘Going Rogue’ will be air dropped over the entire country of Iran. The US State Department commented, “If we cannot starve them, we will bore them to death.”—Trans Talk
“I guess ‘Goin’ All Mavericky’ was taken?”—Beach Peanuts
“Normally I don’t like political books with a lot of photos, but this is an exception. There’s nothing I like more than a girl with a plan … especially when that girl is Sarah Palin.”—Be John Gault
“Remember how I have been warning that she was going to be free to roll around the country like a loose cannon? Well, that time has come upon us, just in time for the 2010 campaign stumping.”—God’s Own Party?
“Four short months to write your complete memoirs! Well, golly gee. Even a dummy knows it doesn’t take long to raise a pail of water from a shallow well.”—Gullible’s Travels
The title itself lets us know that if anyone harbored any doubts about her own view of that disastrous campaign, she is immensely proud of it.
And by “it”, I mean her refusal to cooperate with the McCain campaign, hijacking it for her own delusions of grandeur, generating immense drama and refusing to answer salient questions. Someone in her position with a decent sense of perspective and self-knowledge might have said no to John McCain in August of 2008. Or taken the pick as an opportunity to get boned up on policy. But we see now that she came to see her nomination as an entrepreneurial opportunity - for wealth, fame and irresponsibility. The notion of public service, divorced from reality show culture, clearly bored her and bores her still. She has now found her niche.
(Image: Robert Huffstutter, via Flickr.)
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